Tuesday, 20 January 2015

Going public

We have done it.  We have gone public.  On Facebook.  I tried to announce without being obnoxious, and if I have infertile friends in real life who want to stab me right now, well, I don't know who they are so guess I should watch my back.  The rumour mill will flow along, and in a day or so the entire town will know, without me having to do more than type a few sentences.

Of course, it kind of is a miracle that it hasn't really gotten out more.  I told maybe 7-10 people.  I know one of these people (one I actually trusted) opened his mouth and told a mutual acquaintance, who at least congratulated me quietly and acknowledged that he would keep it a secret when I threatened to kick the leak.  Also, my mother told coworkers and family back home.  But I expected that.  She has an insanely big mouth, especially when it comes to good news. 

I didn't really want to announce it.  I was a little superstitious about it at first.  And I sort of like having it known just among close family and friends.  But it is not something I can hide forever.  Maybe another two weeks if I am lucky. 

So, now that it is out there in the wide wide world of real life, I know what is going to happen next.  I will get interrogated.  I will hear the horror stories of every other woman's experiences.  I will be given advice on EVERYTHING!  Some of this will be helpful, I am sure.  I am new at this, after all, and those who have been there first have valuable experiences and insights.  HOWEVER...some of it will be less than helpful.

To that end, I am going to win this pregnancy.  Yup, that is right.  I am winning it.  For every labour horror story told, I will one up the ante ("oh, she was in labour for 78 hours?  well, I know this woman who was only in labour for 2 but when that baby shot out it actually ripped her a new asshole...seriously.  She couldn't poop for ages after").  For every nosey question, I will ask one of my own (...I will have to think of a few...maybe I will just turn it back on them..."when you were pregnant, <insert nosey question>"  which should be fun if some man is the one asking).  For every piece of less than helpful advice, I will offer some of my own, on etiquette.  And heaven help anyone who invades my bubble to touch my belly (once I have one that doesn't just show my love of beer)...I will bite back my aversion to being touched and touch theirs back!

Clearly, I know how to make and keep friends.  And my own sanity.  Oh well, let the games begin.

(in a few weeks...I am actually working on my own right now and probably won't see anyone I know for a while...I have time to research)

1 comment:

  1. I like your attitude! I hope you don't get too many horror stories. I was afraid of that but people were actually quite decent. I like that you have a plan for how to deal with all the interrogation/anecdote telling!